(LR goes sprinting past with RJ chasing just behind her…)
LR: I’m Jesus, and I’m going to help everyone with my powers!
RJ: I’m the Romans, and I’m going to hunt you down and kill you! MWAAA HAA HAA!
LR: (distant) But then I’ll just come back from the dead and get you! HA HA!
RJ: You know, you can’t actually get history doctors anywhere. They just don’t exist!
Dad: What do you mean by history doctors?
RJ: Doctors that fix people the way they used to, from history.
Dad: Well, I guess not… It’s because we can usually do better using modern methods.
RJ: And also… because those guys are all dead.
RJ: You walk into a shop and are like,
“Hey Buddy, any Romans for sale?”
“No, Sorry… Because they’re all dead.“
(while eating dinner)
RJ & LR: (singing) Boudi-ca! Toughest By Far!
RJ: (singing with British accent) Its bad enough being beaten, but beaten by a girl?
RJ & LR: (singing loudly) Boudi-ca! Super-star!
Mum: Kids! Quiet! No Boudica at the dinner table!!!
(while eating dinner)
RJ: I’d like to thank somebody tonight. I’d like to thank the Romans… for inventing toilets.
RJ: THANK YOU ROMANS!
(LR, Mum and Dad): Thank you Romans!
Dad: They invented plumbing and running water in houses too.
… a few moments later …
RJ: I’d like to thank somebody tonight. I’d like to thank the Romans again… for inventing running water!
RJ: THANK YOU ROMANS!
LR, Mum and Dad: (groaning) Thank you Romans!
… a few minutes later …
RJ: I’d like to thank somebody else tonight. I’d like to thank the Egyptians! For inventing paper!
(LR, Mum and Dad): ARRGGGHH!!
