Respect my authorit… Oh nevermind…
(reading to the kids in the car)
Dad: … Dun dun daaaaaaaaahhhhhhh… That’s the end of the chapter guys.
LR: Daddy! Read more!
RJ: Yeah, keep going!
Dad: We’re almost there. It’s time to stop.
LR: If you stop now, I will not be pleased. There will be consequences, Daddy… Consequences.
RJ: Yeah! You better keep reading! I’m reaching my limit…
LR: (dramatically) CONSEQUENCES!
RJ: … and you wont like me when I reach my limit. I’m just like Mom!
Dad: True. Normally, Mom is just lovely to be around…
Mom: (dark, foreboding look)
Dad: … But it’s never safe to be around Mom when she’s reached her limit.
Mom: (darker, more threatening look)
Dad: I guess I’m pushing the limit, right now.
LR: CONSEQUENCES!!!!!
RJ: I’m getting to my limit, Daddy! I’m warning you!
LR: !!! CONSEQUENCES !!!!!
RJ: !!! LIMITS !!!
Dad: Okay… Okay… A few more pages then.
How to save an orangutan
Towards the end of last year, LR decided she wanted to help some endangered species in whatever way she could. She remembered our local zoo has an orangutan conservation and breeding program with several large, well designed enclosures, and decided that donating money to their program would be a great way to make a difference.
Her idea was to hold an art show where kids at her school could donate two dollars to enter. In return, they would get a certificate and also a chance to win a huge jar of lollies. She hung several of these signs around the school and recruited a few of her friends to help collect money during their lunch breaks.
Nuts about religion
(while eating dinner)
RJ: Can I have some more lamb, please?
Mom: Eat some salad first. You haven’t even eaten any pine nuts, and you love those.
RJ: I can’t eat that!
Mom: Why not?
RJ: Because that pine nut is the God of Victory! I’m still praying to him.
Mom: Well you’re not getting anything else to eat until you eat those.
LR: Don’t worry about that one, RJ, there’s about twenty more gods on your plate right there… I’ve eaten all the gods on my plate, and they were great!
Dad: So what have your gods done for you lately, RJ?
RJ: Well… They helped me at the beach today?
Dad: Really? How?
RJ: I didn’t get eaten by a shark! They kept all the sharks away.
Dad: Good point. I guess they kept all the thunderstorms and earthquakes away too.
RJ: (Bows head and prays to the pine nut). Yep. They’re powerful and delicious. (chomp)
First day of school, 2012
After a stressful evening of packing school bags and reviewing essential school and office supplies (including psychedelic liquid filled rulers and pencil sharpeners), the kids are ready for the first day of school.
RJ is starting Year 1 and LR enters Year 4! Congrats guys!
Transmogrification (without the tiger)
RJ: Dad, if LR comes back from camp with four legs, big marshmallow lips and a mane and a tale and hooves, do we have to keep her?
Dad: I’m not sure RJ. If she can talk, I think we have to.
RJ: She wont be able to talk, Dad. She’s a horse.
Dad: A horse could be kind of useful. Do you think she could make it up the stairs to her room?
RJ: No way!
Dad: I guess she could stay in the backyard. Mom would be pretty upset if we got rid of her.
RJ: It just wouldn’t work. She would eat all the plants and wouldn’t be able to do her jobs around the house. She’d have to go.
Dad: I guess you’re right. Oh well, I’ll miss her.
Pony Camp!
It’s a little quiet at home right now. LR is away at horse riding camp and the normal level of intensity at our place has dropped a bit – although only a little bit, the RJ reality distortion field is still fully operational.
Pony camp is an amazing place — I get all fluttery just thinking about it — a magical land where you spend all day riding horses, cleaning and scrubbing horses, feeding horses, and (be still my beating heart) shoveling horse manure and cleaning out stalls. Mom insists that this is little girl heaven, but I’m not totally convinced.
For the first time in her life, she has ‘her own’ mobile phone with her (it’s a spare that we’ve borrowed from Poppa for the week). We told her it’s just for emergencies or if something goes wrong and she needs to talk to us. After giving her one or two instructions on how to use it, we carefully put it in her backpack and waved goodbye.
Five hours later, while deep in the middle of one of my projects, I was interrupted by an unexpected phone call… from LR and a room full of 7 year old girls suffering some kind of ‘emergency’ involving a large amount of giggling. Apparently, she had to test to see if the phone was still working properly…
Regardless, I’m looking forward to having her back when she gets home… as long as she leaves her boots outside.
Just before she left, she drew this on the fridge for us.
Choose your battles
(While playing in the waves at the beach…)
(RJ runs up to the ocean raising his fist into the air.)
RJ: (roaring at the ocean) I challenge you, Poseidon!!! My mortal enemy! YOU SHALL BE DEFEATED!!!
(RJ punches and kicks, throwing himself at the ocean with great ferocity. Meanwhile, a huge wave sweeps forward towards him.)
LR: (from a safe distance) Look out RJ!
RJ: What the!? ACK.
(The wave crashes over him, dragging him up the beach.)
RJ: Help! Help! Where’s the manual? I need the instruction manual! This isn’t working properly!
Redefining mommy blogging
(while eating breakfast)
LR: I’m doing a new post on my blog about the cathedrals in France.
Dad: Sounds like a great idea! Do you think you’ll ever run out of things to put on it?
LR: Not really. I can always just make up stuff. No one on the internet really knows the truth.
RJ: You know, LR. If you were two thousand years old and you had a blog, you could write lots of stories about your mummy friends and all the things that they’re doing these days.
Dad: Mummy blogging? Wouldn’t that be kind of boring? “Just another day, hanging out at the museum….”, “Well, I’m thinking of repainting the tomb…”, “I found this great sarcophagus the other day”…
RJ: Yeah, but the stories about the crazy one that escaped and is hunting everyone would be REALLY exciting.
December 2011, Photo Wrap-Up
With a huge overseas vacation looming, the first half of December was filled with the last days of the school year, some early Christmas celebrations… and a lot of silly hats.

December means the Advent calendar gets brought out. We like to pretend the kids appreciate the tradition and fun puzzles and clues that we leave in there for them...
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![<a href="http://tobob.com/200912/live-in-concert/">Live, in concert</a> - LR had her first piano recital on the weekend. She was incredibly nervous and needed a little extra time to get up there, but after a few other kids had their turn, she was up and did a great job.
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Read on to see a video of her perfor... Live, in concert](http://tobob.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/wpid1008-200911-Nov29-11-IMG_0394-450x299.jpg)




