Crumpled Home

After a stressful evening of packing school bags and reviewing essential school and office supplies (including psychedelic liquid filled rulers and pencil sharpeners), the kids are ready for the first day of school.

RJ is starting Year 1 and LR enters Year 4! Congrats guys!

The first day of school. Welcome to Year 1, RJ. Welcome to Year 4, LR!

Everything was all very friendly until we reached the school gate... and then LR insisted that she not be followed to her classroom. Parents are just too embarrassing.

RJ waits at the door to his classroom. He's totally ready for Year 1, but are they ready for him?

(while jumping on the trampoline)

RJ: (bounce, bounce) I don’t believe in Santa, you know.

Dad: Really? Why is that?

RJ: (bounce) Well, there are too many problems with his story.

Dad: Such as?

RJ: (bounce) Well… We don’t even have a chimney in our house. How could he get anything inside?

Dad: Couldn’t he sneak in a window or something?

RJ: (bounce) That’s the other problem! He’s way too fat! He wouldn’t fit and his hat would fall off!

Dad: Fair enough. Then what –

RJ: (bounce) BUT! I do believe in Sinterklaas. He’s the Dutch Santa.

Dad: Really? Why do you believe in him?

RJ: (bounce) Because he has Black Petes to help him out. He is way smaller, and fast. They can sneak in anywhere with the presents. Also, his hat is smaller and round, so it wont fall off so easily.

RJ: (suddenly the bouncing stops) … AND Sinterklaas rides a horse. Who ever heard of a such a thing as a flying reindeer? It’s just so ridiculous!

RJ is playing around a stream at a nature playground. He leaps across the stream, climbing stick in hand. Scrambling along the steep bank, he braces his stick and leaps across a yawning chasm between two boulders. He lands safely and sprints over a log that bridges the burbling torrent below. He briefly pauses to gauge the size of his biggest, final jump and with a mighty spring, flies across the gap to land at Dad’s feet.

RJ: Made it! That’s ten times around! I’m also proud to report that we have “Zero days without injuries”!

Another crazy month went by! This time around, Mom and LR got a thousand and one things done before they left for the USA, leaving Dad and RJ behind to survive on a steady diet of buttered toast and cereal. The cousins came over from Melbourne, and Grammy’s house STILL isn’t finished! Finally, RJ entertained an entire school with his own special moves during his class concert.

RJ's friend C visited for a sleepover. The next morning, the two of them insisted on pancakes, the internationally recognised breakfast of bloodthirsty pirates and fierce centurions.

The next stage of our adventure brought us to Monkey Mia, where we met some friendly mammals with a taste for seafood and thousands of crustacean squatters before dragged through the ocean from a high speed catamaran. After a hair-raising drive through an extended muddy bog, we made it to Gnaraloo Station, a delightful paradise marred only slightly by a small infestation of surfers and a veritable plague of ecstatic, frisky whales.

After spending the night in Denham, we got up early the next morning and drove to Monkey Mia. Every day, a crowd gathers on the shore to wait for a pod of dolphins who have been fed there, every day, for years.

LR and RJ try to spot them from the jetty.

The water was incredibly still and calm... Dad had the rare chance to get some early morning photography done while waiting.

LR stands knee deep in water as the pod arrives.

One of the park rangers hands over some of the delicious booty.

The kids spent some time snorkelling and exploring the shallow waters of the bay.

LR and RJ discovered hermit crabs near the shore... There were hundreds of them!

LR heads off to collect another handful of crabs!

Mom booked us onto a boat cruise. It was a great way to get out into the bay and see some sharks, turtles, dolphins and perhaps even a dugong.

RJ and Dad rode in the net, trying to spot sharks as we cruised the reefs.

The boat stopped by a pearl oyster farm where we learned the ins and outs of farming pearls. As we watched the presentation, RJ suddenly darted forward between the speaker's legs to save this tiny crab from being stepped on.

RJ had an audience as he practiced his surf moves!

On the ride back, LR and Dad made up their own jokes to entertain themselves.

One of the wild dolphins had great fun riding the bow wave from the boat.

Once we left the reef area and returned to deeper water, the captain loaded the net behind the boat with passengers and took off -- the ultimate ocean cold-tub.

The next morning, we were off again, heading north past Carnarvon and on to Gnaraloo Station. We stopped along the way to watch the blowholes, as whales happily flopped about just off the coast. Despite the best efforts from the blowholes, with deafening roars and tremendous columns of water blasting from the rock, the kids were still way more interested in the tidal pools.

LR did her very best to break her ankle by leaping maniacally from rock to rock across the puddles, but failed miserably.

Gnaraloo Station lies at the end of a dirt track that runs north of Carnarvon. During the Summer, there is so little rain that the track is packed hard and just about any vehicle can make it through. It turns out that during Winter, it’s a bit of a different story.

In our case, torrential rains had come through about three days prior, and the track had been completely flooded. What was left for us was a series of opaque muddy lakes and bogs of thick, sticky, orange mud connected by small sections of track. The owners of the station had put out the official word to the community that only real four-wheel drives should attempt the track, and even then to stick to the ‘chicken-tracks’. Chicken tracks are side tracks, usually weaving deleriously through the bushland for a few hundred metres, that avoid the worst of the bogs and deepest pools. They’ve been amusingly named by the four-wheel drive enthusiasts for those people who chicken out when driving the main track.

When we called the station and informed them about our rear-wheel drive, towing a heavy trailer, they said, “Sure, come on up. You’ll be fine.” We didn’t discover their ‘official’ recommendation until after we got there.

At this point, we had 80 km (50 miles) of this kind of track ahead of us. Every few hundred metres, we would encounter another massive bog which would require getting out and inspecting. We very seriously considered turning around and not continuing on.

We arrived, triumphant, but utterly nervewracked and exhausted. We took our place amongst the four wheel drives and tried to pretend it had been great fun.

At the base of the cliff in front of camp, there's a famous surfing spot. It was pretty spectactular, with great waves rolling in continuously, all day long.

Dog digging competition!!! On your mark, get set, go!

What's that, Mom? The water's a bit cold?

RJ really enjoyed snorkelling too. He spotted all kinds of fish, and thought he had made friends with two, but discovered they were just damselfish trying to scare him away from their algae farm!

At every opportunity, LR hunted for the most precious shells on the sea floor.

At low tide, we could explore the safer sections of the cliff face. There were lots of little caves and rock pools along the way.

We hiked lots of trails around Gnaraloo, climbing cliffs and exploring. It was a terrific place to watch whales happily flop and splash about, with a few showing up every ten minutes or so.

Some awful, terrible, bad parents set an awful, terrible, unsafe example for their children by jumping down into this sea cave to pick up some pretty rocks, and then frantically scrambling out before the waves came crashing into it.

RJ and his new favorite pet... A 'cuddle' fish.

Big news!!! We discovered RJ's first wiggly tooth!

These super cute bearded dragons were everywhere. They were incredibly curious and had absolutely no fear of people, but at the speeds they dart around, they have no reason to be.

Gnaraloo Bay is absolutely stunning -- some of the most spectacular coral and aquatic wildlife in the world, just a metre below the surface of a huge expanse of crystal blue water gently lapping against perfect, white, fine-grained sand, and aside from this amazingly great family that showed up, almost completely deserted.

RJ and LR gathered shells and rocks built an enormous city that spanned the beach.

These huge sand dunes were just a short hike from the campsite.

It took a while to climb to the top; they were bigger than they looked and we were weighed down by an impressive number of dead crabs.

We finally made it to the top, where we watched more whales springing about.

LR and Dad wandered off with their cameras to get some pictures of the surfers. They had to be pretty brave to attempt the entry from the reef into the crashing waves.

The kids made friends with the boys at the neighbouring camp. Ledgy, their dad, even set up a totem tennis set for them, which our kids promptly dominated.

Oh no! Camping hair!!! (and she still looks gorgeous.)

Being wintertime, we were allowed to have a campfire. RJ worked on his marshmallow chargrilling technique.

LR, to Mom's delight, worked on a careful, slow-roasting technique, producing a series of perfectly toasted marshmallows.

Click and explore this map to see where we actually went!

View NorthWest Australia 2011 in a larger map

During July, we packed up the camper trailer, waved goodbye to our cat and dog and jumped in the car for a massive road trip up north. Our goal? Get to the coral, do some swimming and skindiving, maybe wave to a dolphin or two. The first few days involved lots of driving, but the kids took it well and we had the chance to meet up with friends of ours in Geraldton. From there we continued north to Shark Bay… and encountered some three billion year old creatures, one Barking Fence and a few billion white shells…

Seven hours in the car? There's definitely time for a pit stop along the way. Hello, Cervantes!

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June flew past in a hurry. The kids put together an impromptu magic show one morning, and LR played piano for a huge crowd. RJ flew and continued to be full of surprises. We spent an evening outside taking German lessons in the dark, and the kids channelled their inner zombies while discovering where all their good ideas come from.

RJ took flying lessons at one of his friend's birthday parties. That trampoline practice came in handy!

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Each year, we invite a few friends up to the farm at Gingin to celebrate the winter solstice. After spending the day pruning the fruit trees and tending to the orchard, we fire up the pizza oven and serve a nearly endless stream of delicious homemade pizzas. We follow up by lighting a huge bonfire to brighten things up through the long night. It’s heaps of fun (despite things often going awry because of rainy weather).

Citrus is in season at the moment, and the trees are totally loaded with fruit. LR gets to work picking some mandarins. Delicious!

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RJ: (frustrated) You just have to climb a tree, Dad! That’s all you have to do. Ugghghhhhh… (throws up his hands)

Don’t you know that zombies can’t jump? Don’t you know that zombies can’t climb? They don’t have brains — they can’t figure it out!

You’re just going to have your brains eaten and die.

Is that what you want??

Really??

(shakes head in disgust)

Just days after we arrived, we set off on our Yellowstone expedition. After driving about an hour, we entered the foothills and were treated to stunning mountain views, rock walls and cliff faces — but there was no time to stop! We pressed on and entered the park.

Yellowstone was teeming with bizarre and wonderful wildlife of all sorts. We delighted in spotting something new around each corner: bison/buffalo, elk, pronghorn antelope (SPEEDGOAT!), coyotes, foxes, rabbits, marmots, beavers, eagles, black bears and even one grizzly bear (suspiciously, dad was the only one who saw this). As we travelled, little crowds of photographers by the side of the road gave us plenty of clues as to where to look.

There were lots of tourists around, but we were generally impressed by the state of the park — not pristine, but well taken care of and healthy.

The kids even had a chance to play with some snow! It was pretty grotty, mostly melted and covered in black dirt, but it was magical for them.

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