(in the car, on the way home from school)
RJ: (holding plastic box to his ear) Hello, mum?
…
RJ: Yes. What are you doing?
…
RJ: Making dinner? … Mmmm. That sounds great. We’re going to be home soon.
…
RJ: Oh… What? Hang on… What?(suddenly yelling) WHAT WAS THAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU WELL.
…
RJ: IT’S A PROBLEM. A MOUSE HAS CUT THE WIRE! I’LL TALK TO YOU LATER.
(in the car, on the way to school)
RJ: Can I sing a song for you?
Dad: Sure RJ. Which one?
RJ: Puff the magic whale. It’s like the other song but it has different words.
Dad: Go ahead mate.
RJ: He was stuck by the sea, and he had to dig a hole… a BIG one. It was whale shaped. Then he got back to the ocean.
Dad: Okay. You can sing it now.
RJ: (singing)
Puff the magic whale,
lived in the sea.
And chased some fish
and other things.
And splashed them with his tail! Oh!
Puff, the magic whale….(He continued on with a bit about pirates and lots more splashing. It got decidedly weird when it transitioned into Puff the Magic Sunscreen… )
RJ: Mum says I can go swimming with the whale sharks.
Dad: Okay then. We might have to wait a while to get there.
RJ: Yes. I am a good swimmer now. I’m very fast.
Dad: That would be lots of fun.
RJ: And there will be a great white shark there too.
Dad: Uh oh. Not good. Wouldn’t he eat you?
RJ: No. I’m bringing my toy one. He wants to meet the whale sharks too. But I need help.
Dad: What kind of help?
RJ: I need to make a rope so he can swim along with me. Let’s try with paper and some tape.
(RJ and LR attempting to settle an argument over a toy)
RJ: Whoever… whoever can put up their thumb first, they… They get to have the pterodactyl!
LR: Okay!
RJ: Finger… finger… finger… finger… Oh no! I HAVE NO THUMBS!
LR: RJ! You turned into a muppet! A MUPPET!
RJ: Help! My thumbs! Mup mup mup!
LR: Aiieieee! Muppet boy!
(Dictated by LR on the way to school)
Dear Ms. Frizzle,
We are sorry to tell you this but we had to take away the magic school bus. You can have it back now but there is no magic left in it. The parents didn’t like all the magic things that you were doing, and they don’t believe in magic, so now it is gone.
We are very sorry.
LR (for school administration)
RJ: I want some m??t chewing gum.
Dad: Mint gum? Oh sure, I guess you can try it sometime. Keep it in your mouth though.
RJ: NOT MINT!
Dad: You didn’t like mint last time you tried it.
RJ: Yes. Not mint. MEAT!
Dad: You want… meat… chewing gum.
RJ: Yes! It would be very yummy. Do you think mum will want some too?
RJ: Thank you daddy. You’re a great daddy. I’ll call you servant.
Dad: I’m not sure I want to be called servant.
RJ: I call mummy servant.
Dad: But I don’t think she’s really your servant. That means she does everything you ask her to.
RJ: But she does everything I ask her to.
Conversation between RJ and LR in the back seat:
RJ: Sharks like to eat big animals.
LR: Not really big animals.
RJ: They do too! They like turtles and seals and people. And even crocodiles.
LR: They can’t eat crocodiles.
RJ: Can too!
LR: No they can’t. They’re too big.
RJ: They can eat baby crocodiles.
LR: Baby crocodiles live in the river, silly. Sharks don’t go there.
RJ: Bull sharks do.
