Crumpled Home

We’ve looked, but we can’t find this one anywhere.

Click to enlarge.

(RJ runs in from outside)

RJ: It’s not good, Dad! Our family has some BIG problems.

Dad: What do you mean?

RJ: Well, I tried to lay the cat down in the dog’s bed.

Dad: No luck?

RJ: She just wont stay in there. She does NOT like it.

Dad: Maybe it’s the smell or something. Weird.

RJ: Yeah! And when I put her in, the dog started freaking out and got out of the bed too! Our family does NOT get along.

During the Summer holidays, the family spent a lot of time down at the beach. Its a pretty great spot: calm, predictable surf (i.e. none) and these days the kids are old enough that we aren’t perpetually worried that they’ll drown, eat a toxic blowfish or get carried off by a seabird or something.

The afternoons are filled with splashing, riding their boogie boards, chasing each other and snorkeling along the shore – your typical beach-side activity. Their cousins even came over from Melbourne for a few weeks, so the games and activities were correspondingly more intense. With so much going on, you might think they wouldn’t need a lot of extra entertainment… and for most kids, that would be true.

Unfortunately, RJ is not quite like most kids.

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(overheard in the bathroom)

RJ: LR, when I move out, I have an idea so I wont be lonely.

LR: What’s that?

RJ: I think I’ll fall in love and marry a girl and we’ll have a baby boy.

LR: That’s a good idea!

RJ: I know… and… I’ll never make him move out… and we’ll be great friends… and he can stay and live in my house forever.

LR: You definitely wont get lonely then.

RJ: Exactly.

(later that evening)

RJ: Daddy, if you have to live by yourself, my boy and I will come over and visit you so you don’t get lonely. We can all play legos or do computers, whatever you like.

Dad: Awww… Thanks RJ.

(RJ has been concerned lately about what happens when he leaves home… Who is going to make him leave? Why do his parents want him to go away? Where is he going to live? Who is he going to live with? )

(during a family lunch with everyone sitting at the dinner table)

Poppa: So does anyone want to get up and fetch me a glass of water?

(no volunteers)

Poppa: (gets up and walks into the kitchen) I guess I’ll get it myself.

LR: (with mock dismay) How come Poppa has to do all of the work around here?

Something that comes up from time to time is RJ’s previous life. It almost always starts out with, “When I was a little kid…” and describes a time “before he came to live with our family.” Apparently he lived only with his grandma, because everyone else in the family died. Today, I discovered a little more…

(over breakfast)

RJ: When I was a little kid… I got stabbed.

Dad: Stabbed? You mean before you came to live with us?

RJ: Yeah. When I was living with my grandma… in Malaysia.

Dad: Malaysia? Okay… How did it happen?

RJ: I was playing with a pen and I stabbed my knee. I still have a little sore on my knee from it. See?

Dad: And that’s also why there’s ink all over your knee right now?

RJ: Yeah.

Dad: Strange that I’ve never noticed that before.

RJ: Yeah.